12 May 2007


So. Before another year passes without a post: My son turned one a couple weeks ago! Some of my distant friends have asked about the big day, and I've been meaning to write about it for two (okay, three) weeks now. To be honest, I was a bit freaked out that it's been a year already. How is it that it sneaks up on you like that? One minute he was three months old, lying there like a blob, casually batting at toys in his play gym, the next minute, he's twelve months old, pulling himself up using the ottoman, and walking across the room like a little pro.

One is a fun age for us. He's been pacing around the apartment, repeating "ma ma ma ma" over and over. So far, I think this is adorable. Especially when it produces spit bubbles. He calls for Dada when Rob walks into the another room for something, and has been informing us that "bah-boww" is the most important word in the English language. I figured I would know what bah-boww meant after about a week of hearing it in context, but he says it ALL the time: in his highchair, in the car, wandering the apartment, in his stroller. The only "word" that I can understand so far is "s-dat?", which means "what's that", which is what I say to him all time when he picks something up off the ground. This is usually accompanied by a chubby index finger, pointing vaguely in some direction.

He loves music, which delights me to no end. Any music will do. He smiles when I throw on a CD and starts rocking back and forth to the music. He "pops" his fat little legs sometimes, too, which makes me laugh. He always wants me to pick him up and let him play with the volume knob on the stereo, something his dad taught him.

He's just such a happy kid. He gives me cuddly body hugs and open-mouthed kisses. He holds on to my finger when we walk together outside. He finds so much joy in this world, and has re-opened my eyes to the simple pleasures of everyday experiences and objects. That was one of the things I knew would make parenthood so wonderful. I get to re-live my childhood through my own child's eyes. What a gift.

He's testing my skills as a parent already, too. He has full-on-throw-himself-on-the-floor tantrums when he doesn't get his way. He bites me on occasion, usually during moments of extreme frustration. I question my methods of handling these and other scenarios every day. Am I doing this right? Is this going to reinforce this annoying behavior? Am I screwing him up for life? What the hell am I doing, thinking I can be a mother? Who put me in charge???

And then my husband tells me that I'm a great mom, and that he's proud of me. And I have more and more days where things go rather smoothly, full of smiles, and well-timed naps and fun things to do. And I have my beautiful son, who lights up when he catches my eye, who makes this world so very bright and joyous. I am blessed.

And I'm relieved that the near-panic of the first year is over.

But most of all, I am blessed. Happy Birthday, Boog-a-boog. I am so proud to be your mommy.


sasha said...

Happy Mother's Day!

...see you soooooon!

sari said...

You are a great mom, you should be proud!

Your boy is a sweetie!

Michael C said...

I loved this! It's beautiful and written with so much love. It also reminds me of when my twins were that age - and age I miss dearly!

You are a very lucky mommy!!!